So far it has been quite hectic and slow if you can merge those together in a way that makes sense....to create the last 5 weeks of my life. It is definitely interesting suddenly having to become obsessed over such a tiny little guy. Hubby has gotten a new job, which he likes a lot, thanks to the a-hole job that fired him because he missed work the day of the c-section. He is working 50+ hours a week, so it has been difficult trying to bond all three of us together. But we've done our best.

It was hard with him working all the time, and then when he'd come home, of course he was exhausted. I was worried he wasn't able to bond with Christopher. But he does what he can, he gets up in the middle of the night if I'm tapped out from the ongoing 24/7 Chris-Care. He is a good guy, changes diapers and feeds him, when I know there are some men that refuse. I know there are some men that do more, however I am proud of him because I know in his culture, really the women do all of the 'mothering' and care taking. At least as far as he's told me. It has been a little hard for me to keep going constantly. Christopher sleeps anywhere between 0 minutes to 3 hours, if I'm lucky. I thought I was exhausted when I was pregnant....boy I didn't know the meaning of exhausted! It's scary being responsible for a person that you are not even sure you know how to take care of. But every day I am becoming more and more comfortable becoming mama.

As far as my healing from surgery is going, it only hurts in the incision area when I sneeze. I am down 23lbs! Which is more than I even gained from the pregnancy, so I am feeling great about that. I cannot wait to get to the gym though. Even though all the prego weight is gone, this squishy tummy has GOT to go. It is not welcome here. On another subject, my pregnancy induced carpal tunnel is still here! And sometimes even worse. It still hurts to do simple things, like use scissors, turn a page in a book, load the dishwasher...and yes, pick up and carry Christopher! I need to find a resolution for this because I refuse to live the rest of my life with this major inconvenience.

It's so hard to believe he's been home with us 3 weeks now. He is gaining weight rapidly. Already weighs 6.5lbs and 19in long. His doc said that at the rate he is going, he should be caught up to where he should be by the time he is 3 months. Which is great! Apparently I'm doing something right...lol... The breastfeeding (TMI) is actually a lot easier and less complicated than I pictured. I am doing that 95% of the time and giving a bottle or two of formula a day to him because I need to put his vitamins in them. I would prefer to bf 100% of the time until I go back to workie, but the pedi recommended we do it that way. I plan on switching to full time formula after Thanksgiving.

So....it's a bunch of long days and sleepless nights but every single time I look at him I feel so in love and so filled with something I can't put into words. He's the most perfect person I've ever seen and to know that he came from me is amazing. It's nothing like I imagined, yet everything I imagined. It's frightening, joy-filled, nerve-wracking, and crazy. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. I know every parent says that. But like them, I mean it. All my life, when I tried to picture and imagine what my children would look like, I couldn't have conjured up a child that is this beautiful and precious to me. He is my proof from God that I must have done something right in my life to deserve him. I will be his champion and #1 Fan forever.